Social Anxiety and Manners
September 13th, 2006 by Aaron
I recently flew out to visit family for a few days. Family I’ll save for another post (a much longer post). What I’m interested in now are manners. Small social interactions that traveling for a day entails: doors held open, thank you’s given, appreciation shown.
I’ll call this another fringe benefit of social anxiety. I have good manners.
I always return phone calls. I always confirm appointments. I always hold the door open for people. My car is old school and has to be unlocked separately at each door. I always walk around and unlock my passenger’s door first. I always say please, thank you, all of that. I try to make sure that anyone who is doing anything for me knows how much I appreciate it, even if, ostensibly, it is their job.
Because of SAD I have a highly developed sensitivity to how my actions might make other people feel. And I always remember just how much small kindnesses help me.
On a negative note, I am constantly struggling to remind myself that most of what is said and done to me is not meant personally. But the flip side is that I see the potential for other people to have the same problem, and I do what I can to make things easier for them.
And this gives me good manners. It makes me conscientiousness.
What do you think? Is this a benefit of social anxiety? Did my parents just do a good job? How has social anxiety affected your manners?


