Archive for September, 2006
Physical Symptoms of SAD
September 27th, 2006 by Aaron
In my last post I talked about one sign of social anxiety. In this post I want to mention the sign that made me certain I am dealing with SAD: physical symptoms. I’ve had them for a long time. I can certainly remember them being present well back into being a kid at school.
How to Use Typology with Social Anxiety
September 25th, 2006 by Ryan Oelke
This is part 3 of a series of posts on typology and social anxiety. Part 1 explores the relationship between social anxiety and typology. Part 2 explores the particular connection between introversion and social anxiety. Part 3 will provide methods for exploring typology and applying it to the path of overcoming social anxiety.
In this post I offer a few steps to discovering your personality typology, along with engaging questions to help you reflect on the connection between your typology and your social anxiety. Please feel free to ask questions, seek clarification, and share your own opinions. In order to be concise I’ll have to leave some things unaddressed, but perhaps I can do an additional post. Read the rest of this entry »
Doubting From Fear
September 23rd, 2006 by Aaron
I’ve often felt as if I am battling my own opinions.
I have trouble seeing clearly the difference between what I think I should like and what I actually like, between what I think I should feel and what I actually feel.
I see it as a consequence of a life spent doubting my own judgment.
Proactive and reactive
September 22nd, 2006 by dashh
I was thinking today about how the difference in being proactive versus reactive can be a huge factor in anxiety levels of those that are socially anxious. For many, many years I have been (and many times I still am) reactive in social situations. For instance, if I was at a party or social function I would stay in the background of conversations or groups and never initiate anything. Then when someone did ask me a question I would usually get that hugh rise in anxiety and the fight or flight response would kick in. I might reactive defensively to a question or just freeze up, stutter or stammer out a brief response and then feel shame and guilt. I was reacting all the time to my surroundings.
One technique I have found that helps with this is attempting to be more proactive in social situations. For instance I may introduce myself to someone first instead of waiting for them to do so. Or, when walking down the street I might smile and say hello to people to practice being proactive instead of just looking away or waiting for someone to say hello to me first. There is something about feeling more in control that seems to ease the anxiety response. It also seems to help me not identify and get caught up so much in the whole internal anxious drama that can happen in those situations. I am a little more free to just be me. It is hard and takes patience and practice but can help out a lot.
Do others out there have similar experiences with being very reactive and not very proactive? If not, try observing your behavior and think back to social situations and contemplate if you were reactive. If you are aware of this, how have you tried to deal with it and what has and hasn’t worked for you?
Typology and Social Anxiety: Part 2 - SAD and Introversion
September 19th, 2006 by Ryan Oelke
This is part 2 of a series of posts on typology and social anxiety. Part 1 explores the relationship between social anxiety and typology. Part 2 explores the particular connection between introversion and social anxiety. Part 3 provides methods for exploring typology and applying it to the path of overcoming social anxiety.
The best way that I can demonstrate the importance of typology in working with social anxiety is by using my own life as an example. I first learned that I was an introvert and embraced that fact long before I formally knew I experienced social anxiety. I remember feeling a huge sense of relief because I had long been resisting that part of me. Unfortunately, introversion is only recently being fully understood1, and our society still reacts to it as “shyness” or something abnormal. Which brings me to an important point: SAD and introversion can be easily confused, especially by a person with SA, as I should know. Read the rest of this entry »
- The Introvert Advantage is and excellent book on what introversion is and how introverts can take advantage of their own personality strengths, as well as how to live in an extrovert world [back]
Typology and Social Anxiety: Part 1
September 18th, 2006 by Ryan Oelke
This is part one of a series of posts on typology and social anxiety. Part 1 explores the relationship between social anxiety and typology. Part 2 explores the particular connection between introversion and social anxiety. Part 3 provides methods for exploring typology and applying it to the path of overcoming social anxiety.
Exploring typology has tremendous pontential to help a person with social anxiety for at least two reasons:
- Typology is an inward journey, which is in contrast to the continual external focus that characterizes SAD.
- Typology is meant to validate one’s own natural personality. Often those with SAD will resist, even fight or grow to dislike their own personality traits (not always, but it seems prevalent). This is especially true with introverts as the difference between SAD and introversion is at first difficult to notice, particularly for those who are both introverts and struggle with SAD. Read the rest of this entry »
Social Anxiety and Manners
September 13th, 2006 by Aaron
I recently flew out to visit family for a few days. Family I’ll save for another post (a much longer post). What I’m interested in now are manners. Small social interactions that traveling for a day entails: doors held open, thank you’s given, appreciation shown.
I’ll call this another fringe benefit of social anxiety. I have good manners.
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